And the baby is a….
I’ve been struggling to find the words to write for this post. I could just write a single sentence that will share the news revealing the sex of the little munchkin who is now rolling and kicking in my tummy.
Or I could wax on lyrical.
It is a weird feeling watching the computer screen painfully anticipating the sonographers words that will point out to you “willy or no willy.”
“Legs are close together. I can’t really see anything yet.”
“Well, it must be a girl then,” piped up Craig from behind him.
I don’t know how he was able to make out much through the blurred computer images, but he guided us through all the major organs and bones of our baby’s body. I was amazed at how much they could see; it was the only time I would ever be able to see the insides of my child and it’s heart rapidly pulsing in and out. We watched as red fire lit up the screen, blood coursing through our precious baby’s body. All the organs were present and perfectly formed, all fingers and toes accounted for with a regular heart beat.
I thought of some of the many babies, young children, or adults who have not been so lucky and I felt so incredibly grateful that my baby was growing in such a healthy way. There was really nothing else that mattered.
But still, I wanted to know just what this little bubba of mine was.
And while the sonographer was not 100% sure because he couldn’t get a great look due to the clamping of the legs close together, he was pretty certain about what he could not see.
I’m so glad that I found out.
I would never in 4 months time want be in the position where I am holding my little precious baby girl, meeting her for the first time and having the slightest feeling of disappointment that she was not a boy. That is not how you greet someone who you love unconditionally and who needs your love so much.
Now I have time to bond and prepare and focus on all the wonderful things about having another girl. I know the most important thing is that she is healthy and I am so grateful for that. And when I look at the photo of her sweet little face sucking her thumb, I am already filled with love for her.
There is a part of me that is sad, as is Craig. It is a strange feeling to know that we will never experience being a mother or a father to a boy. I am not going to deny that I don’t feel a little disappointment and a small sense of loss by it. But, this is life, we cannot control it and everything that happens is exactly the way it should. So, I let go of that part of me that could of once been. A son was not written in my stars.
I will have two son-in-laws instead. Two well-chosen son-in-laws.
I am gifted with the opportunity to raise two beautiful strong independent women. What a privilege that is! Somebody or something has faith in me to do it. I have one adorable, sweet, funny and charming girl who rocks my world. I am now going to have another one.
I am really lucky.
Kalyra is so happy to be having a baby sister. I can only imagine the good times those two will have together and the fights. Flashbacks to headlock wrestles with Raelene, my older sister, and mum screaming in the background “Would you two just get along.”
Now we do, really well. It is so special to have a sister you can laugh and talk with- I have two.
At least Kalyra will now have someone to play Barbie schools with. (big cheers from Mummy and Daddy)
Daddy is going out to buy another shot gun and take up meditation classes so he can survive living with three women.
I am going to keep praying that little one will be born a couple of weeks early so I don’t have to live with three Virgos.
And the name? Well that one you are just going to have to wait until Aug 26 no…. 14 for!
Comments
Gillian @OneGiantStep
Congratulations to all of you! And thank you for sharing the highs and the lows of finding out. I’m sure it won’t matter one whit once that little one joins the three of you! Cheers!
Caz
Thanks Gillian. I am sure once I see that little cherubs face it will not matter at all. I saw lots of little girl babies today and I got really excited. Kalyra is already planning our girl club activities which is so super cute and special. Poor Daddy!
Cathy Sweeney
Yay! Now you know! Loved your post and thoughts about having another little girl.
By the way, what’s wrong with having 3 Virgos around?? August 25th birthday girl here
Caz
One Virgo is lovely, but three will drive me nuts. I don’t know about you, but my two Virgos now are super organized and detail orientated people. I am a big picture airy fairy trying to just go with the flow and keep the harmony (Libran)- they stress me out.
Torkona
it’s a girl! congrats
cant wait until I reveal our little secrets to our baby, born soon (few weeks to go! eek!)
great post.
– tork
Caz
How exciting Tork!! Can’t wait to read about it. It is such an incredible experience.
Olivia Townsend
Congratulations guys! Another gorgeous girl! Kalyra will love having a little sister too. I know the feelings you are going through – except reversed with us, having 2 boys. Though once you have them – you could not imagine things any other way August 20th is a good day for a birthday – that’s Ethan’s! Best of luck with everything !
Caz
Thanks Olivia! I hope she comes on the 20th then. Will you guys have a third?
Olivia Townsend
Well I am still making up my mind about a 3rd – I always wanted three, but honestly don’t know if I want to do it all again … guess we’ll wait and see once Kael is a bit older. Good luck with everything – very exciting times
Caz
Now what you mean. I can’t do it again either! I’m too old anyway.
Olivia Townsend
You are definitely not too old!!
MaryM
Congratulations! This must be a very exciting time.
Caz
It is Mary, really exciting. I’m ready!!
Jeremy B
Congrats to both of you! Condolences to Craig with three women now! I love having my two boys!
Caz
He’s already lamenting the fact he’ll have no one to watch football and basketball with. What about us blokey chicks!! We’ll even have a beer with him I personally think its the best thing to happen to him. Will make him softer LOL
Jess
YAY!! Congratulations! You mist be thrilled! The experience of the sonogram sounded amazing!
Caz
It is a pretty amazing experience. It’s incredible what you can see. It’s hard to believe that she is only about the size of an eggplant. Looks so much bigger.
Val
We might be biased, but we think two girls is fantastic!!!! Our girls are best friends, forever leading each other astray and thick as thieves! Lily wants the next one to be a girl!
Caz
Three girls Val!! That shouuld be serious trouble. It will be a lot of fun I’m sure having two girls. Craig might have to get some tips from Dave on how to survive it.
Adventurous Kate
I’m so excited it’s a girl!
My sister and I are about the same age difference as Kalyra and the little baby. If they’re anything like us, they’ll spend a few years trying to kill each other but will grow up to be best friends. My sister and I even lived together in Boston for two years.
Congratulations to you all!
Caz
Thanks so much Kate. I’m getting more excited every day. Kalyra was choosing some names for her new sister today. Her favourite was Silla which did not quite get the go-ahead from Mum and Dad!
Siobhan Kindness
just got round to reading your post – really lovely news – love the thumb sucking pic! There is one great thing about virgos, they are super tidy and also knowing quite a few, including my son, they have a systematic compulsion to order things. Being a pisces, with a tendency to be creative and a little dreamy, they come in handy! Hope all goes well for you both=) p.s. not sure if you can tune into the “Nightgarden” where you are, but go for it if you can – it reminded me of the magic roundabout (yes, showing my age now) but really amazing tot TV!
Caz
Oh god the Night Garden!! Kalyra never misses it. It’s good as it comes on not long before bed so she knows that its time for her to get ready to go. Kalyra definitely has that systemic compulsion to order things. She’s been doing it since she was a baby, she orders things perfectly. At times I wonder if she is OCD, but I think she is just a Virgo. She’s a wonderful helper though, which I love. It is good to have Craig’s Virgo brain behind our travel blogs, because I miss all of the tiny details. I just don’t think like that. Thanks for the comment
siobhan Kindness
I nearly married one – so it’s definitely a virgo trait – lol. I follow you on the OCD thing though – we mothers are always watching every moment and wondering – what if…? Make the most of it, as now I have been reduced to power rangers! Sadly, I never get to watch full episodes – only certain sequences – followed by Ben 10!!! Bring back the night garden and the pinky ponk =) Deep down, there’s a part of me that doesn’t want him to grow up – must be time to add more!!!
Lorna - the roamantics
congrats to you all!!! such a joy and i’m sure that kalyra will be an amazing big sister to this little girl
Caz
Thanks Lorna!
Brenda Sedore
Congratulations! How wonderful to be having another little girl. I have two girls (although I had two sons first!) and it’s wonderful to see them together. They are now 18 and 19 and they are such good friends. They weren’t always close growing up, as they’re so different, but now to see how they appreciate each other…it’s rewarding.
You have such a sweet daughter and I’m sure she’ll love having a sister…most of the time.
Caz
Having a sister is something special. I am happy for my two baby girls.
Martine
I loved this and is so very close to my heart. I am also due for a baby the same time as you (exactl time actually!) and just had my ultrasound this week. For me it was such a relief to get the ultrasound out of the way as after having a few ‘not so good ones’, I am a bit ultrasound phobic now! Anyway we decided to find out too mainly so that if it was another boy (we already have 4) we could basically put an end to the annoying comments about trying for a girl. For us, we had a little girl who passed away at 4 months of age, and so we are so well aware of how precious our children are regardless of the sex. After we lost our daughter we wanted another child but I was actually very afaid of having another girl (long story for another time!) so I was relieved when our 4th little boy entered the world. Because there was a gap between him and the other 3 we decided to go one last time to give him a little playmate and I just felt I had one more in me! When we found out we were having a 5th (and final) boy I again felt only joy. I think the only time I was a little disappointed at not having a girl was for the second child. But once you have same sex siblings you realise how amazing that is, and what a wonderful bond they all have. (not to mention the bonus of sharing clothes, toys, activities etc). Sure there are things I will miss about never having another daughter but like you said, this is the hand we have been dealt and I feel so blessed to have the gorgeous family that I do. Enjoy your beautiful girls.
Caz
I am so sorry about you losing a child, I couldn’t even imagine the pain you must have went through. I don’t think there could be anything worse. Five boys! Wow! That is incredible. It is so great that you are so happy about it as well, but as you said you understand how precious they are and the close bond they all have. It is good knowing that we have a lot of stuff already for our new little girl. And I do love dressing up girls. Kalyra will love to help as she is a little fashion diva- she picks my clothes out for me.
It is great to meet someone who will be having a child at around the same time as me. Where are you from Martine?
Martine
I live in Melbourne. Have just been reading about some of your travels, some amazing experiences you have had…..and many more to come!