How do you know when you’ve made the right choice?
Making a decision can be a paralyzing process, especially when it’s those heavy ones. You know the ones where we focus more on what could possibly go wrong, than all the great things that can happen because of the right choice.
I thought I had the decision making process for these important decisions, but recently I realized that despite following that process I had gotten it all wrong. Introspection followed.
“What the hell? Why did I mess it up so bad?” I thought I knew how to make the right decision.
I came up with two answers.
1. You had to make that choice to arrive at the perfect place. Even though you don’t think it at the time, all paths are leading you to the right place. It’s just you don’t like the end result. The Universe has to help you learn a few lessons along the way. Focus more on it being the perfect choice and you’ll come to accept where you are currently standing.
My post could stop there, but there is a second important part to this answer.
2. If you don’t have to learn any lessons and you are ready to arrive at the perfect place immediately, then there is no process. The right answer is as simple as stepping forth, 1. 2. 3. There’s a signal that comes from your gut that says, Yep this is right.
You don’t need to evevaluate the pros and cons and think about how your life would look at the end if each road, you just step forth onto the one that guides you with certainty.
When I was preparing for my wedding. I gathered together my mother and bridesmaids to go shopping for my dress. We blocked out the day and had the avenue of bridal shops mapped out. We arrived at the first dress shop, I flipped through a few dresses and was not pulled in any direction.
I think it was my Mum, who found one and asked me what I thought of it. I had lingered over it before, but now my Mum had pulled it out, I was in the that-could-be-me zone.
“I’ll try it on.” I put it on and just knew it was the one.
I walked out and told Mum, “That’s the one I want.”
“Caroline, are you sure. We have all day. Why don’t we just look around a bit more. you can always come back.”
“No.Why do I need to? That’s the right one.”
The fun girly day was over. I did the same thing with my shoes, I did the same thing with the property I bought a year earlier, I did the same thing with the property I bought a few months later. I did the same thing when I decided to buy a house with Craig after being together for only 4 months. Bang.
Why do I need to think about it? I just know.
Each decision took me to the happy perfect place. When I thought and agonized over a decision, and doubted myself, I lost $500.000.
When I thought about my decision and evaluated a dozen different scenarios for weeks, I chose the wrong people to work with.
Thinking about it causes me to mess up because the thought process speaks of doubt and lack of trust in the process.
I recently made another big decision. A voice that sounded like my mother’s entered my head.
“Caroline, don’t you want to think about it?”
“No. Why do I need to? I just know this is the right one. Like walking, 1, 2, 3.”
The all-knowing springs forth from my gut.
Yep. You got this girl. This is the one you need to do. No questions asked. Love that MOJO!
How do you know if you've made the right choice?
Comments
Coral Musgrave
I prefer on the spot decisions, I met my husband to be on my birthday and married him exactly a year later.
Vanessa
I hesitated over a no-brainer decision recently and currently it feels like doing so has lost me the opportunity I thought I would have. Which, in the grand scheme of things, is fine because there will be other opportunities (and if they don’t come along, I’ll have to make them myself). But I feel so out of touch sometimes with my goals, and I’m hesitating that something else will go wrong because that’s what happens every time (or so it feels like). Lesson learned? Well, only if I put into practise trusting my gut!
Caz Makepeace
The gut knows it all– very easy to say though! So hard to follow it, that bloody head of ours!
Kathy
You are so right Caz – the agonizing can be worse than the wrong decision, and if it does lead to the right decision it was wasted anyway.
Miss Pink
I have to agree that gut feelings are usually spot on. The head muddles, but not only that, if you listen to your head for too long it drowns out those gut feelings and it can be hard to get back into touch with yourself.